Batty Blend (A Paramour Bay Cozy Paranormal Mystery Book 13) Read online

  Chapter Nine

  He’s staring at me, Raven. It’s unnerving. Make it stop.

  The next hour had been spent collecting a carrier from Janice, convincing her that we wanted to foster Count Cuddles until he found his forever home, and notifying Liam that Count Cuddles had actually found us instead of the other way around.

  Unfortunately, we’d had to postpone getting answers from Beetle regarding my mother’s whereabouts when Count Cuddles woke up and became overly excited at Leo’s presence. One frenzied thing led to another chaotic moment, until our hairy-legged guest had once again hopped onto Leo’s back.

  I still wasn’t sure how there had been no broken teacups or saucers.

  That death demon took a chunk of my hair out, Raven. I already have a bald spot on top of my head from Satan’s mini-feathered dragon. In case you hadn’t noticed, I’m in short supply of appropriately placed fur.

  “The chickadee was upset because he thought you were going to steal one of the colorful feathers from his nest,” I pointed out, all the while straightening the sale items on the table. Once everything was back in place, I stepped back to survey my work. Doing something this mindless allowed me to converse with Leo over our next plan. “Count Cuddles clearly likes you. I think he’s lonely, and he just wants a friend. He’s our responsibility for now, so I need you to be on your best behavior. Please keep him company while I find out what Beetle knows about Mom.”

  You’re trying to play on my sympathy for this harbinger of death, Raven. It won’t work. I know a hungry look when I see one.

  As if our hairy-legged friend understood our conversation, he let out a little squeak.

  “You always said that you wanted to mentor Cupcake, but that she wasn’t receptive to your attempts to educate her,” I said, not feeling at all the least bit guilty about influencing Leo’s outlook. We still had to locate Mom and figure out the identity of the visiting vampire. “Wouldn’t a hairy-legged vampire bat be better in a squirrelpocalypse over Mindy’s kitty cat?”

  The fact that Leo had stopped cleaning himself long enough to think over my suggestion told me that he would consider extending an olive branch to our new hairy-legged, fanged friend.

  I needed to sweeten the deal, though.

  “I’ll also have Beetle get you more blueberry-flavored edibles,” I promised, knowing that I’d solidified the deal when he wiggled his backend to settle into his cat bed.

  They aren’t just blueberry-flavored, Raven. There are actually dried blueberries crushed into pressed, premium organic catnip to make the chewiest edibles that I’ve ever had the pleasure of consuming during my…well, whatever life I’m on right now.

  “You can tell Count Cuddles all about your new favorite treat,” I encouraged, glancing over my shoulder to find that Heidi was still grilling Beetle about the whereabouts of my mother. She’d taken him outside of the teashop so that I could get Count Cuddles settled while convincing Leo to help us out. There was one more thing that I needed to confirm before joining them. “Leo, are you sure that you’re not getting even the slightest inkling as to where Mom might be? I mean, you always know where to find me.”

  That’s due to our connection. Technically, my beloved Rosemary transferred our link to you and me. It’s a summoning thing. If the Mistress of the Dark doesn’t want to be found, then I can’t sense her presence, especially if she’s used magic to conceal herself. It’s actually a fairly simple ward incantation. It involves Runic magic, which we’ve yet to study. Trust me, though. Even if I had a special radar when it came to that woman, I’d still be unable to avoid her constant nagging. She did you no great service by neglecting your training earlier on.

  I guess that made sense, but I still wasn’t quite convinced that Leo just didn’t want Mom involved with this whole vampiric threat to our small town. I’d been going to ask him more questions about Mom, but he’d already launched into his recruitment speech to Count Cuddles.

  The hairy-legged vampire bat was nocturnal, and his daily activities thus far had clearly tuckered him out. His little beady eyes were winking closed for longer periods with each passing second.

  It appeared that I’d lost both of their attentions, so I left them to their own devices as I joined Heidi and Beetle outside. The foot traffic had slowed down, so this was the perfect time to get to the bottom of his reticence regarding my mother’s whereabouts.

  “He’s all yours,” Heidi exclaimed, throwing her hands up in defeat. “I’m going to the bakery for one of their caramel macchiatos with two shots of added espresso. I have a feeling that I’m going to need it. Want one?”

  “Yes,” I replied, agreeing that we were going to need something stronger than mints and a granola bar to keep us going until we were able to locate Mom and the visiting vampire. “Whipped cream on mine, please.”

  Now certainly wasn’t the time to worry about my hips.

  “Beetle, I realize that Mom directed you not to tell me where she is, but she’s not returning my calls,” I said, trying a different tactic. “Would you please try to contact her? I won’t ask you again where she is, but I really need to know that she’s safe.”

  “Yes,” Beetle said, nodding vigorously in agreement. He even reached into his shirt pocket tucked behind his cardigan for his cell phone. “Yes, I can do that!”

  I waited patiently while he called, wondering just how rude it would be of me to snatch his phone away once he had my mother on the line. Truthfully, such an ill-mannered action would be one of my lowest points. I didn’t want the baggage that came with that action, but Mom somehow needed to know that we were in the midst of a major issue.

  Beetle pressed the phone to his ear, rocking back on his dress shoes as he waited for Mom to answer. I still had some major doubts when it came to their relationship, but no one could deny that Beetle cared for my mother.

  He absolutely adored her.

  I guess when it came right down to it, I was more concerned for Beetle. He had a heart of gold, and he didn’t deserve to have it shattered into a million, tiny pieces.

  My mother could be overbearing, obstinate, and pretty high maintenance. She was also a witch, who honestly hated the boundaries of witchcraft. She most likely would have been excommunicated had she been raised in such a setting, so Nan had most likely done her a favor by raising her outside of such conventual, supernatural confines.

  Still, Mom had loathed the parameters that Nan had set for the both of them here in Paramour Bay. Thus, I was left in the dark concerning magic until Nan had passed and I found out from a talking feline.

  I guess the bottom line was if Mom could up and leave Nan without batting an eyelash to raise me in New York City, all the while feigning to give up witchcraft altogether, what could she do to Beetle’s emotional stake in their relationship?

  “Oh, dear,” Beetle muttered, pulling away the phone from his ear. He stared at it in dismay before pressing it back in place. He waited a heartbeat or two before leaving a message. “Regina, my love. Please call me back immediately. Immediately! Raven is looking for you. She’s also really worried, and I’d really like to keep my promise to you.”

  I thought over the various ways of handling the current situation, but it was highly doubtful that I’d get Beetle to betray my mother’s confidence. I had to think of a way around such a big obstacle, because a simple locator spell wasn’t going to do the trick. Mom was too smart for that, and she would have camouflaged her whereabouts with a ward just like Leo had mentioned earlier.

  “Beetle, I’m really worried about Mom,” I reiterated softly, watching his expression the entire time. He was beginning to appear a bit worried himself, but I had a feeling it was because she hadn’t answered his call. One of my fears was that she might have told Beetle about our abilities, but then I highly doubted that was something he could keep to himself. This was about something else entirely. “Mom told me that she was driving to New York City to visit some friends this weekend. Beetle, she said that she’d be back
this morning. What if—”

  I rested my hand on my chest, directly over my heart, as I shook my head in concern.

  “You’re a horrible actress,” Liam muttered as he pressed a kiss to my cheek. I’d seen him walk across the street from the direction of the church. I’d let him know an hour ago that we’d found Count Cuddles, but something else must have kept him in that area. I’d also clued him in on the fact that Beetle knew where Mom had gone to this weekend, and also that he wasn’t saying a word on the subject. “Beetle, is everything okay?”

  “I sure hope so, Liam,” Beetle exclaimed with a frown, rocking back on his dress shoes again. “I sure hope so.”

  “Mom told me that she was going to go and see friends in New York City this weekend,” I said to Liam, who was convincingly displaying his innocence. “When I couldn’t get ahold of her this morning, I got worried. It appears that Beetle knows where she’s gone, but she has sworn him to secrecy. He won’t tell me where she is, and I’m really worried about her.”

  “Beetle can’t betray Regina’s confidence. That wouldn’t be right, would it?” Liam was able to get Beetle to nod vigorously in agreement, relaxing slightly now that someone was on his side. “Did she say that you couldn’t tell anyone else? Is there a way for me to check on her if she doesn’t return your call within a few minutes?”

  I breathed a sigh of relief that Beetle seemed to actually ponder over Liam’s question. Spotting Heidi walking toward us, I decided to give Liam some time with Beetle. As long as Liam was able to find out where my mother was, I didn’t mind being kept in the dark.

  “Did he finally crack?” Heidi asked as she eyed the two men while handing me a caramel macchiato with extra whipped cream. I could already see the pink lipstick on her own white plastic lid. “He’s completely in love with her, you know.”

  “I know,” I replied with a grimace. “She better not break his heart.”

  I savored the sweet, warm coffee drink while watching Liam from afar. Would he be able to convince Beetle to spill the beans on my mother’s location? I was beginning to wonder if the visiting vampire hadn’t somehow figured out that we were onto him.

  What if he had followed Mom into the city this past weekend?

  Mom had promised me that she’d keep a low profile while discreetly asking questions in parts of the city that were best avoided, especially since it was completely possible that there were more than a few vampires roaming the streets of the Big Apple.

  “I know what I’m about to suggest is really far out there, but maybe it’s time for us to visit Agnus,” I proposed, causing Heidi to choke on her beverage. “I’m serious. I thought that maybe I’d be able to try a locator spell on Mom, but she’s probably put a ward on herself. Leo can’t locate her at all, and Beetle won’t break his promise to her. Our options are becoming quite limited, Heidi. What if the visiting vampire figured out that we were onto him?”

  “You don’t think…”

  Heidi’s words trailed off as she struggled to finish her sentence, but I quickly realized what had popped into her head. She was actually considering that Jack might still be the vampire, which was ludicrous.

  The more thought I put into it, I believe that Harry might have been onto something when he said that vampires age at a slower rate than humans. With how many times he’d returned to his hometown under a different identity, it would make sense that he was a lot older than Jack.

  Besides, Jack didn’t even reside in Paramour Bay. That was simply another strike against him being the visiting vampire.

  “No, don’t even go there,” I warned, my stomach fluttering with nervousness when Beetle walked into the teashop. Liam began to walk our way. “You said that there was no way that Jack could have faked his shock at your…well, your garlicy appearance and accusation. Plus, there are a million other reasons that he couldn’t be the one we’re looking for,”

  “It was mortifying, and don’t think you’re off the hook to fix it,” Heidi muttered in mortification. “I’ve definitely decided that it’s for his benefit and not ours.”

  I wasn’t so sure about that, but I did agree that there were quite a few blurred lines when it came to witchcraft. I’m sure that we could find something in the family grimoire to help in a situation like this.

  “Well?” I asked Liam, who was currently smirking. My stomach knots eased just a bit. He wouldn’t be finding humor in this situation if there wasn’t any to be had. “You know where she is, don’t you?”

  “Sort of,” Liam replied, holding up his hands so that I didn’t get too excited. “Beetle and your mother have decided to have a Christmas wedding.”

  I’m pretty sure that Heidi snorted whipped cream out of her nose. I cast her one of the Marigold’s infamous eyebrow arches.

  This situation wasn’t funny in the least.

  “Seriously? Why would that be such a secret?” I exclaimed, changing my mind about having my mother here. I might strangle her, and then Liam would have to arrest me for murder. She was off making wedding plans while I was dealing with a vampiric threat that always seemed to end up with an explosion of some sort at the pier. “I mean, we all know that they are engaged to be married.”

  “You didn’t hear this from me, but she wants you to be her Matron of Honor, and she was picking something up today on her drive home. Apparently, she had to take a small detour where reception can be a bit spotty.”

  “That’s so sweet,” Heidi said, nudging me with her elbow once more.

  “Sweet as it may be, we still need help.” I sipped my caramel macchiato as I began to come up with various plans as to solve our current problem. “If the colony of bats have already arrived, then whatever diversion the vampire has planned will happen soon.”

  “I’ve already contacted a buddy of mine down at the pier, and he said that he’ll keep a look out for anyone or anything suspicious,” Liam interjected, having covered one item on our list. “Do you want me to go and speak with Charlie Buttons? We already know that it’s not Lyle Jenkins.”

  “What about Samson Akers?” Heidi asked, lifting a hand to shade her eyes from the sun. “I don’t even think that I’ve ever met him.”

  “Samson is a fisherman,” Liam revealed as he observed a couple of vehicles driving down the main thoroughfare. “There’s no way that he’s sensitive to the sun. Um, I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but I think there might be another kink in your plans.”

  Heidi was really having trouble drinking her caramel macchiato.

  She must have sucked the hot beverage down the wrong tube. She began having a coughing fit to beat all fits until I had to slap her on the back a time or two to help her catch her breath. I was left to wonder if someone had put a hex on us today, because there was no possible way that we could deal with another problem in today’s midst of vampiric pandemonium.

  “Jack is here,” Heidi responded with a wheeze, tapping her own chest to try and clear her airway. “What are we going to do? I would not look good in a straitjacket, Raven.”

  “We’re not allowing anyone to put you in a straitjacket,” I promised her, grateful when Liam said that he’d postpone the inevitable confrontation. “We’re going to do what we do best…create a magical blend!”

  Chapter Ten

  You’re going to do what? Never mind. Unfortunately, I heard you the first time. This is a bad idea, Raven. Bad idea, with a capital B! First, you rope me into keeping Satan’s demon company while he drifts off to Lalaland. I’m not sure that he even heard a word I said about the squirrelpocalypse. Now I have to find out that you’re about to create a magical blend for that oaf of a detective to consume in order to once again take away my soulmate? Unbelievable, Raven! I’m putting my paw down!

  “You can stomp those pudgy paws all you want, but this is something that needs to be done,” I replied with determination, measuring out the right amount of periwinkle. I’d already added ashwagandha and bacopa. Usually, these herbs were used to enhance the memory. I had a rev
erse application of the charm that would do exactly what we needed done. “Can you locate Mom yet?”

  Leo tilted his head and twitched his whiskers, allowing the artificial light from above to shine off the tiny bald area on his head.

  Nope.

  Double checking the components that I’d gathered in the mortar before picking up the pestle, I was confident that I hadn’t left any ingredient out that would alter the effects of the tea. Heidi was in the main part of the store, heating water in the electric kettle.

  By the way, do I want to know what the conversation was between my BFF and the good ol’ sheriff?

  “Nope.”

  Leo huffed when I answered him in the same manner as he’d responded to me regarding Mom’s whereabouts. It was hard enough to concentrate on the words that I needed to chant three times in the same tone and pace, let alone discuss the fact that Mom and Beetle wanted to have a Christmas wedding.

  What just crossed your mind? I could have sworn I picked up something about my BFF being dragged to the altar by a herd of tiny elves. Not even the Mistress of the Dark would be that mean, would she?

  “Shhhh,” I responded, needing to concentrate.

  Don’t shush me. I wasted a good twenty minutes talking to a demon from Hades who cuddles a blue bear blanket in order to sleep. I should be over at the inn, causing my nemesis and his minions utter—

  Leo gasped the way he did when he came up with a new battle strategy, and I had no doubt that he’d had an epiphany, concocting some grand plan for the squirrelpocalypse.

  Well, he’d just have to wait, because we had more pressing matters at hand.

  How would you feel if I borrowed Count Fangs-A-Lot for a half hour? Okay, maybe an hour…tops.

  “Nope,” I repeated, followed up by another hushing sound. I was almost at the part of the incantation where I would say the mantra. The various components had been ground with a pestle into the tea leaves for preparation of the spell. “I’m ready.”